Post-concert blues

March 17, 2008 at 5:43 PM

I performed on the violin twice yesterday, in two different venues. Once, in the morning, a quick church performance of some Mozart violin-viola duets filling in for someone else due to illness. The second, in the afternoon, accompanying the Arlington-Belmont chamber chorale on "Executive Orders," as I blogged about previously.

It was a lot. I enjoyed both, but felt rushed and like I didn't have time to savor the experience. I also MISS MY VIOLA! My friend for the duets is a professional violist, and of the two of us I have more violin experience, so it made sense that she play the viola part and I the violin part, but when I heard her playing the viola part, I felt almost a physical pang. With all these violin parts, I haven't touched my viola in weeks. I even felt the need to bring my violin to my lesson last week, rather than my viola. I feel sad about it.

The choral concert seemed to be a success; the chorus did very well, and the guests I invited (who are visiting from Germany) said they especially enjoyed "Executive Orders." And they learned something about US history in the process.

But I'm having trouble getting over a mistake I made in the performance. One of the movements was especially difficult to put together as an ensemble. We had limited rehearsal time and the only recordings available were midi files without choral parts, as this concert was the first performance, the world premiere. For this particular movement, there was a repetitive viola ostinato (making it hard to gauge where you are by listening if you lose count) with unusual riffs on top of it by the other instruments. And the chorus singing. None of the instruments were playing with each other for any length of time, or with the chorus.

And, some of the riffs for violin I included, among other things: 1. playing behind the bridge; 2. a descending glissando tremolo; 3. a low G-sharp followed by a G-natural three octaves above it and only a sixteenth-rest in between; 4. triplets played 3 against 2 and 4 played by violin II; 5. twenty-three measures rest and conductor busy cue-ing more important vocal parts at time of entrance.

I had gotten this movement completely right in 1-2 rehearsals. I had flubbed two parts of it in the dress rehearsal. And in the performance, I did the first entrance/riff correctly (behind the bridge, glissando/tremolo) and screwed up the second (23 measures rest, G's, triplets). Violin II may or may not have come in correctly (she probably did), but in any case, even if she didn't, it doesn't excuse me.

There were a few other things that I had done wrong in one rehearsal or another that I know I fixed and did correctly in the performance (I stayed with/under alto soloist, in rhythm, when we both had the melody; I entered alone and correctly while basses were singing and conductor was busy cue-ing them; I kept 5/8, 7/8, 3/8, and 10/8 time as it switched back and forth between those from measure to measure; I did not miss D-flats when it suddenly switched from B-major to A-flat-major). And, my guests said that no one would have noticed that I blew that one entrance in that one movement, since the music appeared somewhat chaotic anyway in that movement--and it was *supposed to*. So I should stop beating myself up, right?

But, the composer was there. He'd notice. And, it was being taped. It was the world premiere.

I don't remember where I read this, but somewhere I read that a big difference between an amateur and a professional is that a professional gets it right the first time. With limited rehearsal. So, I'm not a professional, and it showed. Even though I know that, I feel kind of embarrassed. My blown entrance has been digitized for posterity.

There is an encore concert in May where the same piece is being played. I have another chance to get it right. What steps can I take between now and then?

From Tom Holzman
Posted on March 17, 2008 at 6:55 PM

Karen - congratulations on the concerts. And, do not flog yourself over mistakes. Violinists who are much better than you or me make them in concerts (I have heard them), and even getting it right in rehearsal is no guarantee that you will not slip up. If I had a buck for every mistake I made during a concert, I could buy a much better violin than I have. So, give yourself a big pat on the back, do a little viola, and move on to the next project.

From Pauline Lerner
Posted on March 18, 2008 at 4:49 AM

Your description of that piece of music sounds like Violinists' Hell.

From Karen Allendoerfer
Posted on March 18, 2008 at 11:08 AM

There were a lot of different things in that movement--what I was trying to do was keep track of all the hard things I did right. In some ways I hope I can be proud of myself, because at least there were more of those than things I did wrong. :)

From Ray Randall
Posted on March 19, 2008 at 4:31 PM

As mentioned above professionals at all levels make mistakes also. If no mistakes were ever made we would be boring robots.

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Post-concert blues

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