February 2008

Lazy Saturday

February 23, 2008 17:18

Well, after teaching 11 lessons in a row, I'm rather pooped, so I think I'll be lazy this time. I'm in a list-making mood, so I'll share a few of my recent ones here.

First, business. Amid recent frustrations with my teacher, (i.e., the fact, that I'm not learning much from her) I'm trying to figure out how the heck to teach myself. So, one day, I just sat and jotted down the things about my playing I most want to improve:

Bow: consistency of stroke from frog to tip (emphasis on the tip, where I tend to get messy); distribution
Left hand: accurate intonation (lifelong battle . . . ), relaxed hand frame, especially when playing double stops, continuous vibrato, connection between fingers in string crossings
Musicality: clarity, clarity, clarity of musical ideas, both large scale, and in individual phrases

Okay, so having done that, I had two thoughts 1) Gee, this all sounds so . . . basic; shouldn't I have mastered some of this by now? and 2) Okay, I know WHAT I want to fix, now HOW do I go about working on it? So, I came up with the idea that I need to pick one or two different goals to work on in each different etude or piece I'm learning. Thus, list #2 is born:

Scales: consistent bow stroke, relaxed left hand
Etude: relaxed left hand, straight bowstroke/flat hairs, smooth string crossings (both RH and LH)
Sarasate, Introduction and Tarantella : smooth bowstroke in opening, intonation overall, coordination
Mozart, D Major Concerto: articulation, clarity of phrasing
Brahms G Major Concerto: continuous, rich vibrato, bow consistency, phrase direction

So yeah, that's the general plan. So much to work on, so little time. That's how I always feel . . .

Okay, now for the fun part. So, the other day I was chatting with a friend, and a piece would come up and I'd say, "Ooohh, I really want to play that on a recital someday." So, just for the fun of it, I decided to write down all the music that came to mind that I'd LOVE to play for my college recitals. Here goes:

Bach: Chaconne
Bruch: Double Concerto for Violin and Viola
Sarasate: Zapateado
Elgar, Debussy, and Franck Sonatas
Part: Spiegel im Spiegel
Bartok: Romanian Folk Dances
Vaughan Williams: The Lark Ascending
Rachmaninov: Vocalise
Smetana: Trio in g minor

I think that gives me sufficient fun to look forward to. ;)

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Figuring out the future

February 13, 2008 15:10

Well, I guess I have a plan now. In my last blog I talked about how frustrating my situation has become at my current school. I don't feel like I'm learning enough on my instrument, and the environment here isn't particularly challenging or inspiring. So, after looking at the options and thinking things through, I've decided to try and transfer somewhere else for my junior year. That'll give me enough time to do my research, save up, and prepare audition material.

In a way, it'll be like going through college auditions for the first time. When I graduated from high school, I really didn't audition anywhere but my current school, and even that was pretty casual. I new I'd be admitted and get some kind of scholarship. I'm just a little scared now because . . . I've never really tested the waters before in terms of the larger musical world. I've always been the big fish in the small pond, and it's starting to get really old. And discouraging. I'm sick of having no one to look up to. I honestly can't think of a competition, or summer camp, or master class that I auditioned for that I wasn't admitted to. That's . . . probably not such a good sign.

But things are going to be different now. I sent in an application to the Aspen Music Festival last month, with Paul Kantor as my first choice for lessons. So, I guess I'll just have to wait and see if I get admitted. Provided that happens, and the money works out, I definitely want to attend, so I can widen my musical experience.

As far as possible schools goes . . . I have three in mind so far. In terms of teachers, my first choice is probably CIM, where I'd want to study with Paul Kantor. I've only had one master class with him, but just that one class told me instantly that he was an incredible teacher. I continue to hear nothing but good things about him. Then, I'm also looking at studying with Brian Lewis at the University of Texas at Austin. I know him from my time at Sound Encounters music camp, and greatly admire him as a teacher, performer, and a person. My last idea so far is to study with Ben Sayevich at Park University (in Kansas City). I studied for him for a year before he moved to KC, and know that I would be challenged and learn a lot from him. I'm looking at audition requirements now. I'll need a concerto, obviously, two movements of solo Bach, some etudes, scales, and possibly one more piece (although a Paganini caprice could probably do double duty). I'm thinking of possibly starting the Dvorak Concerto and the Bach Chaconne over the summer. We'll see . . .

I should probably ask around and look for one or two more options, just in case. If I go to Aspen, that'll be a great opportunity to scout out other schools and teachers. With so many options, its just hard to know where to look without knowing any of the teachers . . .

I have to admit . . . the process feels a little daunting. But I'm not learning enough where I am, and I don't want to waste the precious time and energy I have now. At least now I feel like I have direction and goals. That's a start. I think the only thing that can help me at this point is planning and practicing. With emphasis on the practicing. ;)

P.S. I need a teacher who can teach me this. This is what I want to learn! And precisely what my teacher can't offer. I try to aim for this in my own practicing, but I can't teach myself. Agh!

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Inertia

February 8, 2008 21:39

AGH!

I feel musically stuck.

To be honest, I've felt this way for about the past year — I just haven't noticed it as consciously until recently. I just don't feel like I've really learned much in the past year or so. Part of it it is probably that with starting my first semester of college, my practicing has become slightly more sporadic (despite the fact that I'm a performance major). My rate of progress is pretty much directly proportional to the amount of consistent, creative practicing I do.

But I think the underlying reason is . . . my teacher. She's very encouraging, enthusiastic, and organized. But to be perfectly honest, I really don't learn very much in my lessons. I'll show up, play my scales, maybe an etude, and one or two of my pieces. Sure, she'll help me with bowings and fingerings, which is always nice. She'll have suggestions for the specific mood of each piece. She'll give me technical advice now and then on a few spots. But besides maybe a couple bow issues, I can't recall a single significant, important thing from the past year and a half that she's taught me. We never work on technique as much as I'd like. Last lesson I had to stop and ask questions to get any kind of meaningful help. It seems like I'm teaching myself more in my lessons than she is. Musically, my teacher is a little more helpful. In a way. She'll have nice suggestions, but . . . her musical ideas just feel so shallow to me sometimes. I'm working on the Brahms G Major Sonata right now, one of the most deep, sublime pieces ever written for violin. And yet, the extent of her imagery for this piece is comments like: "oh, this opening is just a sunny day, a walk in the countryside." Or, "the development has to sound like a storm; I want to hear the rain beating down." Nice ideas, but there is so much more to this music. So, so much more . . . this is music that is supposed to tug at your very soul.

On Wednesday, we had our school's first snow day in six years. It was fabulous. And you know why I enjoyed it so much, I realized? I didn't have a lesson because classes were cancelled, and instead was able to stay home and practice for like 5 hours. And you know what? In that 5 hours of practicing, I learned more on my own than I have in about the past month of lessons. It just made me realize how frustrating my situation has become.

And then yesterday, this feeling was confirmed. In orchestra, we had a string sectional taught by my school's viola professor. It was really great, and very productive. The sad thing? I probably learned more, musically and technically, from that sectional than from most of my private lessons. The viola professor borrowed my violin occasionally to demonstrate points. His playing didn't sound too great on the violin, but the things he taught were all great points. I hate to admit it, but seriously, it makes me want to take lessons from him. Yes, you heard me right: I want to take violin lessons from a viola teacher.

Am I crazy? I'm really seriously considering taking lessons from him. I was thinking maybe twice a month or something like that. Enough to get help, but not so much that it gets to be too much extra time/money commitment. So I guess my question is, how awkward could this be? How would I go about telling my violin teacher about this? I think I could explain it by saying that I'm learning a lot of new music right now (which is true) and saying that we can never get through enough of it in just one lesson a week. I can give essentially the same reason to the viola professor. Can this work? I just don't have any better ideas. I'm sick of going to my lesson week after week and coming away afterwards with the same two thoughts every time: "wait, what did I learn today?" and "gee, I just really need to practice."

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More entries: March 2008 • January 2008

February 2008

Lazy Saturday

Figuring out the future

Inertia

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