July 31, 2004 at 12:57 PM

Nothing's up lately. Practicing as usual, everyday. Everythings getting so repetitive. wake up, shower, go to tennis classes, wait for my sister's karate to finish go home at 12
lunch, practice until whenever my fingertips and I can take it, and put the instrument away until tomorrow. It's driving me nuts. I really need a good program to go to. It's so rare in Iran for a good concert to go on, that when one acctually does go on, tickets can hardly be found. either that, or I have finals, so I can't go any way( like last term, when the national orchestra had a preformance, right on the night of my arabic exam, (yes, we have to learn arabic here)). anyway, I've come to realize that after I practice a certain piece and practically master it, I tend to loose the feeling, it feels as if I'm a machine, just playing notes, with no emotion whatsoever. so I go to the lesson, play well, teacher says that was excellent, and I have this kind of numbness towards the piece. Its not that I don't try, it just doesn't come out. Its especially hard when I have recitals, good technics, but emotionally, nada, zip, nothing.
Guess I have to try harder.
sheri