Apathy

June 22, 2006 at 3:01 AM

A great friend of mine, a jazz pianist, told me to avoid apathy at all costs. "It can sneak up on you, and must be avoided." How true. I've seen apathy in other musicians. I've seen it in myself. And it must be avoided.

How does one avoid apathy? That emotionless state that knows neither pain nor passion, the black hole of the soul, that safe place we all run to at times of frustration and fear.

Stay passionate. That is the key. But can love be forced? No, but it can be nurtured. And it should be nurtured and cultivated, and cared for like the most delicate flower.

In music, it is easy to do. Or at least it should be. One lesson. One conversation. One recording. One phrase. One great instrument. One live performance. One great glass of wine. One candle. To hear the sound of wine being poured into a glass in a candle lit room with a great recording in the background while having a meaningful conversation with the one you love. That is passion.

Then why the apathy? Is it an age thing? Does it come at a certain age because by then many paths have been followed to their own dead end? That's no excuse in my book. The roads are endless. It must be fear above all else. Fear that one isn't good enough, fear of not fitting in, fear of hard work, fear the hard work won't pay off. It's fear, and fear comes from ego.

Why not just stay focused and positive and loving? Listen to music, practice music, and perform music. It's that easy. And do so with everything you have. Don't hold back. Lay it all out there. And at the end of the day, say "Today I tried my very best. I am one step closer..."

Oh yeah, Mr. Fodor had some good advice concerning the Paganini 1st Caprice today. "Base the tempo off the passage in thirds, keep your thumb bent and don't worry about playing loud."

From Jim W. Miller
Posted on June 22, 2006 at 6:07 AM

Haha I own apathy and don't remember giving any away so what are you doing with it.

I was noticing the kids next door jumping on their trampoline the other day. After a while half the kids in the neighboorhood were on it. Unconstrained whatever. Tried to remember back to those days and thought about apathy. I think it amounts to the old things just not meaning as much. Stay on the trampoline!

From Terez Mertes
Posted on June 22, 2006 at 6:51 PM

Nice thought-provoking entry, William.

I don't think apathy is necessarily an age thing. I keep waiting to get apathetic about all the things I can't fight. Darned if I don't keep fighting them. I'm full of passion, all right. If it keeps up, I might very well self-detonate some day.

Next Zen question - what is the difference between
acceptance and apathy? Can they both be nature's way of helping you take a breather from life's intensity and the losing battles we invariably engage in?

Anyway, nice post. Something to chew on for a while.

From Gabriel Kastelle
Posted on June 23, 2006 at 7:50 PM

Yes, everything and previous comments. Welcome! Nice posts.

From Pauline Lerner
Posted on June 24, 2006 at 6:19 AM

Your description of apathy as an "emotionless state that knows neither pain nor passion" is very close to one of the definitions of depression. Depression is also sometimes called "flat affect" (psychiatrists and musicians use that phrase differently) or "emotional numbness." Lots of times people are depressed and don't realize it because they don't feel sad; in fact, they don't feel anything. Sometimes people feel apathetic because their own "mind" is scared to let them feel very unhappy. It's a self protective mechanism which can be maladaptive, depriving people of the opportunity to confront their own sadness in a constructive way.

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Apathy

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