Ahhh...quiet

May 29, 2006 at 3:40 AM

My best friend is a medical resident who lives two hours away from me in Modesto, so on the rare occasions when she has time off, I make arrangements with my (wonderful) husband to spend the night at her place. It's a much-needed respite from the soundtrack of "Mommy Mommy Mommy Mommy Mommy" that plays constantly in my own home, and I just spent a very satisfying practice session in the relative quiet of her house. Unfortunately I don't have the stamina to take full advantage of this environment, but I plan to get in another half hour before I return home tomorrow morning.

The Unitarian Universalist church I attend had a service dedicated to the Old Testament this morning, and the worship leader asked me to play the Kol Nidrei (in the arrangement by Max Bruch). I'd played this about three years ago, before I started taking private lessons again, and it was really rewarding to realize how far I've come since then. I still had my old simplifying markings in the music, eliminating some double stops and taking some phrases down an octave, only to find this time around that I didn't need to use them. The high stuff on the E string was a breeze, and the double stops, while not perfectly in tune, were not impossible as they'd been then. I was quite satisfied with my performance, and my husband, whom I trust always to give me an honest opinion of my playing, said he thought I did very well. Yes, progress is good!

I'm worried about a recent change in my 3-year-old Kiera's enthusiasm for the violin. I thought I was following her lead by starting her on violin at this age because she wanted to---even though I'd originally planned to wait a few more years---and for about the first five months she did wonderfully. In the last several weeks, though, she's become extremely resistant to practicing, and it's like pulling teeth to get her to do anything; she complains that she's tired and doesn't want to play. I think it would be premature to let her quit, and I don't want her to keep giving up on things that are difficult for her. At the same time, I don't want it to be such an ordeal that she ends up hating the instrument. My husband thinks it's because she's now being asked to do far more than she did in the past; instead of just holding the instrument, she's got to do that and focus on bowing straight on just one string (no easy task on a 1/32 violin, even for me) and put her finger down in the right place. We're going to talk to her teacher about what's going on, but I'd appreciate any comments from parents with older children who have been in my situation.

From parmeeta bhogal
Posted on May 29, 2006 at 7:55 AM

In the first couple of years especially, my children went through cycles, up was a time when they were happily practising all the time and down when it could be several weeks of what you described, not wanting to play, excuses, the playing indifferently when made to...
In the ned I think they are just natural in many children. Playing an instrument is difficult and they go through these times when the 1)the pieces of music have become boring through overuse, but in order to become unboring they need to improve 2)other children are having fun not practising 3)just general fed up with doing the same thing.
I have tried not to push during these times, but rather agree with them about being tired etc. and then tell them to play just 5 minutes/or one piece, you know to keep their hand in. I usually found that once they had actually picked up the instrument for the agreed five minutes, they end up actually playing the full session!!! (although I didn't insist on it).
Another thing was to make up a timetable so that they would have the exact time to start and finish (maybe when she is older). I found that is they knew that they had to start practising at lets say 6:15, it was somehow easier for them, maybe because the time was mentally chalked up for practising. This is during the down cycles.

From Sydney Menees
Posted on May 29, 2006 at 12:22 PM

That's great about Kol Niederi (I am in the orch playing it in youth orch)! And your daughter...I used to be like that, but my parents used rewards (like, finish book 1, get a toy) and I would practice. I wouldn't let her quit; if my parents let me quit, I would be so mad at them!

Totally Random - My sister was immunized against chicken pox and she got them today on her birthday!

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Ahhh...quiet

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