August 14, 2004 at 8:43 PM

I decided to record everything that I'm supposed to be playing for my recital in November straight through with the idea that I'd send it to my teacher before school starts so he'd know what we're dealing with. I did them in a different order, though. I was so tired and out of stamina and mentally a bowl of oatmeal that by the second hour (why it was taking so long, I don't know....hm....) I found myself making up fingerings and bowings to the first movement of the Beethoven (I'd already done the other mvts) because everything seemed to catch me off guard. How does one work on stamina? And since I wasn't really practicing I didn't fix anything and it was a very honest recording. I might actually send it. Maybe not. If I do, I'll add liner notes aka my own observations. Like...that in the Beethoven I have NO sense of pulse or steadiness and each section is in its own little world. Maybe having the pianist playing between will help with that. I don't know, though. It was pretty non-rhythmical with lots of rushing and jagged changes of tempo and then back again. About half of the notes were almost to slightly to maybe to really out of tune. The Ysaye got wild and then I restrained it, but, still. The bach was the best. The cadenza is very unique. I don't know how acceptable my choices are....I didn't realize just how "my own" it was....the third movement of the Beethoven is a bit sloppy and the second movement, I think, is too slow. Concentration a big issue. Well, I'm so tired from doing that. How am I going to get through the recital? I know adrenalin will help, but for real! I need caffeine now. Lots of caffeine. Want to swim in it. No, then I'd drown because I'd be trying to drink it all. Maybe I just need a good massage. That's what my husband is good for!
-JW

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August 14, 2004 at 8:43 PM

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