Awesome.

October 13, 2005 at 4:00 PM

I just had the best lesson with Mr. Preucil! I can't remember ever laughing that much in a lesson. We spent some time going over recital dates and rep, and what concerto I should play next. Having played grossly serious concertos for the past four years, I feel that whatever I start after next week's performance will be really refreshing. We've narrowed it down to Korngold or Walton, I believe. However, it was hilarious to hear him discuss my other options. I mentioned Khachaturian and he didn't look too enthused. When I asked why he launched into this nostalgic backstory of how that concerto was all the rage in the '70s once the Oistrakh recording came out, and every American violinist was playing Khachaturian, and it's kind of repetitive. Hilarious!

I'm mostly so excited at having lots of new rep that it's easy for me to forget that I'm playing Brahms very soon. There's a NUSO concert on the same night so some of my friends can't make it, but hopefully a few of them still can. I have a feeling the whole performance will be another exciting, liberating experience for me, which is always a good thing.

Mostly Mr. Preucil today just reminded me of what music is all about--why I'm in this field and so in love with it despite its corruption. Even with preparation, some concerts you just go into with blind faith. Then he even brought up this crazy notion that you're always a bit better than you think you are! I'm still trying to wrap my brain around that one. I played a few spots and the most helpful one by far was the opening of the second movement, which I was actually most dissatisfied with in the concerto competition preliminaries. (In those, by the way, I was generally incredibly happy and pleased with how I played, and that turned out to be more important than not quite making the cut...and I'm looking forward to watching the finals!) Somehow in a very short time we were able to make that phrase so much calmer, more steady and stable, and I could immediately hear the difference in the sound and the quality of beauty really emerging. If it seemed a little too loud to me, he assured me that with orchestra it's not. In fact, that's another great thing about studying with him--he always knows exactly what's going on in the orchestra and has sort of mastered the art of which rubatos will work and which won't, etc. Anyway, in general we just talked about balance between core sound and beautiful nuances, and it's comforting that he's so nonchalantly positive that I'll find my way with that.

I am currently listening to Mahler 6, the "Tragic" symphony, and I do believe that if anyone could have premonitions of his own future (as with Kindertoetenlieder), it would be Mahler. If he can awaken spiritualism in the disillusioned, imagine how strongly he must have felt that power within his own soul. The Cleveland Orchestra concerts this weekend feature Mahler 9! Look no further than the last movement.

Awesome.

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