and just like that, it's all over

May 26, 2008 at 7:00 PM

There's nothing cooler than walking on stage with a big program ahead of you and to feel almost nothing beyond a sense of calm and an underlying excitement to play. The only thing that freaked me out about the idea of playing the recital was the notion that I was doing the Bach from memory, no score in hand. But I never really got nervous. I was very determined to not cave and use the score. I'd been practicing running it through for at least two weeks before the recital so I knew that I could do it but there's always that little twinge of self-doubt poking you gently in the back of your mind, which maybe is a good thing since I was very determined to do it by memory and get through no matter what happened. I think another huge factor that helped make it such a positive experience was walking out on stage and seeing a row of friends all sitting there cheering me on! It makes you feel almost fearless because you know that they are there for you and want you to succeed and it makes you feel kind of invincible. You obviously still have to remain focused and concentrate the entire time but knowing that there are people there who will scream and holler at the end no matter what happens makes it so much easier to relax!

So last year I talked about, what did I talk about? Probably the dress.... *goes and looks through the archives from February 2007*... yes I did talk about the dress and the new found sense of control in my playing. I wore the same dress again and again I felt a new sense of control in my playing. Previously, vibrato has been a hugely frustrating point for me in performance and just in general. This performance, as well as many of my more recent ones, I've not tensed up as much as I used to. I also, especially in the Bach, felt a much greater ability to stay in the moment with what I was playing. I didn't think ahead as much and my mind didn't wander off topic of what I was doing. But you don't really want to hear about all same things that happened last year that happened this year, only magnified so I'm just going to get to the mushy stuff!!

My friends and family!! This year I have been incredibly lucky to work with some really great musicians and friends! Someone said they were looking forward to coming to my recital and hearing my "army" of pianists, I didn't really have an army, I had three, and they were all fun and very different to work with!! A huge thanks to Winnie, Sunny and Iman who have all been great friends and a great support this past year! I've thoroughly enjoyed working with you all and feel really thankful and blessed to have had the opportunity to play with you all!
Another big thanks to all my friends who came out to the concert and cheered me on! As I said above, walking on stage and seeing a whole row of you was an incredible feeling and a lot of you were supportive throughout the preparation process for this recital and all your love and support and encouraging words and willingness to sit and listen to me hack through my repertoire in the weeks leading up to the recital were a massive help to me!
And another big thanks to my parents! The left at 5:30 in the morning so that they could get to Vancouver by around 11:30 or so for the recital and they were back on the road back home by shortly after 3 in the afternoon. They spent 12 hours in the car just so they could hear my recital! And credit for the dress goes to my mom!

I really can't put into words how grateful and happy and thankful and blessed and everything else I feel right now. I couldn't have hoped for a more positive experience for a first "big city" recital and I can't wait until the next one!!

From Tom Holzman
Posted on May 26, 2008 at 7:55 PM

Congratulations! Keep up the good work.

From Stephen Brivati
Posted on May 26, 2008 at 10:31 PM

Greetings,
a very gifted healer once told me that the only question the Divinity may ask you when you move into your next plane of existence is `Why didin`t you use the talents you were given to work with in this life?`
I think you will just get a free pass.
Cheers,
Buri

From Yixi Zhang
Posted on May 27, 2008 at 4:40 AM

I'm so happy for you! It's going to get even better from here on, I'm convinced.

From Anne Horvath
Posted on May 28, 2008 at 12:58 PM

I enjoy reading your blogs, and it is nice to hear about all of your accomplishments and progress this year. Good for you.

Also, what a gorgeous dress. You look fabulous! That is my favorite color, so when you tire of that dress, please send it along to me. (Insert smiley face here).

From Kelsey Z.
Posted on May 28, 2008 at 4:50 PM

Thank you all!
Buri, that's very sweet, thank you!

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and just like that, it's all over

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