August 18, 2003 at 5:45 PM

Between a student’s summer activity, be it work or school or something so lucky as a music festival, there is usually a particular area of down time in August before he or she returns for the fall semester. A lot of us hate this time because it’s starkly asocial, compared with our busy summers and upcoming years at school. This year is no exception for me, and returning to a hot, humid central PA from the high and dry mountains of Colorado has been a call back to the real world. However, being the baseball fan that I am, I’ve had so much time to watch games and read about the game, and to enjoy some of the charm that goes along with a summer passed by baseball. And since I’ve had this time on my hands, I’ve started to think that it might be really fun to combine two of my loves in an unlikely way. Here’s a Rob Neyer-like proposal of an all-virtuoso “lineup.” It’s not a ranking at all, but the way I’d concoct a “batting order” if I were managing a team of virtuosi. I’ve tried to base it on their playing personalities, and how they equate with the roles on a baseball club. I hope it makes sense to some!

1. Pinchas Zukerman cf
(A distinguished Mozart player, he’s great in the leadoff role. His consistency and ability to “get on base” are invaluable.)
2. Henryk Szeryng 2b
(Szeryng is one of the most solid players—er, hitters—to ever play the game. His day-in, day-out, unselfish approach makes him a gold glove infielder and a lifetime .333 hitter.)
3. Itzhak Perlman DH
(Not known for his mobility as a fielder, Perlman’s power and ability to come through in the clutch makes any manger salivate. Though it’s unusual to bat the DH 3rd, perlman’s bat behind szeryng’s contact is irresistible.)
4. David Oistrakh, c
(The clean-up hitter has the most power in the lineup, and can go yard at any time. Every opposing pitcher respects him, and he often draws walks. His abilities behind the plate are superlative, with great technique and the penchant for blocking balls in the dirt.)
5. Eugene Ysaye, 1b
(As a first baseman, his height is an advantage. His ability to take a pitch to any part of the park is unparalleled—that is, he can manipulate a pitch (chord) and go anywhere he likes with it. Last year he led the league in RBI with 130).
6. Maxim Vengerov, rf
(A tremendous arm in right, this youthful infusion adds zest in the clubhouse. He has power, speed (depth of sound), and incredible tools (technique). Already, he’s won two gold gloves and has led the league in doubles.)
7. Gil Shaham, 3b
(Committed, a born hustler, his love of the game carries him through. A great 3rd baseman, he had only 4 errors all of last season. A sweet bat…sound.)
8. Yehudi Menuhin, lf
(This seasoned vet knows a thing or two about shagging fly balls. A strong contact hitter in the 8-hole, his lifetime .357 average is the best in baseball history. Not a power hitter, but severely dangerous. You want him up with two outs and two on.)
9. Fritz Kreisler, ss
(Not known for his technique as a hitter, crowds love his style of play at shortstop. He’s the clubhouse clown, a guy that’s absolutely necessary on a world series team. Though he only hit .247 last year, he was .289 with runners in scoring position, and had only 2 errors at short all season.)

Where’s HEIFETZ?!

He’s on the mound, of course. He’s difficult to take out of a game, and understandably so. He holds the most Cy Youngs, 13, of anyone in history, and has 6 no-hitters, 2 of which are perfect games. A manager needs other good pitchers on the ballclub, though, so while he is the staff ace, he’s supported by a killer rotation:

Isaac Stern RHP 15-7, 3.21 ERA, 100k, 40 bb
Shlomo Mintz, RHP 16-9, 3.09 ERA, 89k, 38 bb
Nathan Milstein, LHP, 20-3, 2.21 ERA, 135k, 52 bb
Jaques Thibaud, LHP, 17-10, 2.90 ERA, 90 k, 60 bb

And a bullpen of studs, all great set-up guys:

Josef Gingold, LHP, 2.00 ERA
Glenn Dicterow, RHP, 2.62 ERA
Soovin Kim, RHP, 3.41 ERA
Cho-Liang Lin, LHP, 3.27 ERA
Manny Borok, RHP, 2.82 ERA

Finally, the closer of the team. A guy who shuts the door in the ninth, a fireballing righty who, while sometimes providing excitement, gets the job done with flair and authority:

William Preucil, RHP, .94 ERA

This is my team. I must also credit my coaching staff:

Paul Kantor-Pitching coach
David Cerone-Hitting coach
Peter Salaff-Bench coach
Bob Lipsett-3rd base coach
David Updegraff-1st base coach

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August 18, 2003 at 5:45 PM

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