November 18, 2004 at 11:56 PM

Well, I ended up not doing much practicing at all yesterday. I was so incredibly tired, especially my left arm and hand. I tried some scales and my pinky was so tired it refused to go down. So I took it easy, went through Tchaik slowly, practised a couple spots and then went to rehearsal. The winds in the orchestra sound very good, some of them actually studied in Holland! While playing I realized I have now payed the Tchaikovksy on every continent on the north side of this world: America, Europe and Russia, and Asia. I am so incredibly lucky! I love this concerto so much. PLaying yesterday the second movement was a real treat and on the last page of the last movement I always get so excited. It is so much fun, to get there after all that work!
I am trying to forget that I am at a competition, I just want to play well. Although it is hard to forget, there is a lot of money at stake and much more important, I want to show people that Tchaikovsky is not overplayed, but simply a beautiful piece. He wrote it at the lake of Geneva, a place were I have very fond memories of. My best friend now lives only several kilometers from where he wrote it (Clarens, in between Montreux and Lausanne). Tcaikovksy had basically run away from an unhappy marriage and then he met this violin friend, with whom he worked intensely on the concerto. I think it was a periode of great stress, but at the same time also a great release to him. And all of that you can hear in the concerto. There is despaire, sorrow, but never without a sparkle of hope. However dark things might seem, there is always somewhere in the orchestra or violin part a tiny little bit of sunlight.
But how else could it be. Imagine being at the lake. Behind it are the big alps, you can see mont Blanc and les Dents du midi quiet well from there. It does not matter if the weather is all ugly and nasty, those mountains stand there in all their majesty. And on some days there will be lots of clouds, it is misty, you can not even see to the other side of the lake. But the lake then becomes straight out of a fairytale, it has something mysterious about it. And then on sunny days, well, I can't really describe it: it is something you have to see, it is so incredible!
The concerto is a mix, I find, of this, together ofcourse with Tchaikovksy's slavis blood. The last movement being a dance with all its slavic rhythmes and melodies. The second movement is a song, a song about loosing innosense, but also regaining it!
The first movement is again quite dancing, it has a lot of elements of some of his ballets. At the same time, it is so lyrical. I can imagine putting a choreographie under this movement.
Well, that gives you an idea of what I'll try to make the audience part of this afternoon. I am very much looking forward to it, but l so incredibly nervous. I need to forget about the competition, past rounds, possible wins, everything! And just make music, the rest is out of my hands. The only thing in my hands is the violin and I would like to make her sing tonight.
See you later!
Carla

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November 18, 2004 at 11:56 PM

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