Domino effect nerves + shaky hands
I don't know what topic this goes under... I'll try it here. Let me know if it should be somewhere else!
For over a year now, when I get excited to play, my hands tremble. It's not performance anxiety causing it, per say, but it's triggering a domino effect of nerves.
See, people don't phase me when I'm playing. Okay, so maybe one or two people that I really admire phase me a little. But big crowds? Never. Big crowds excite me and make me play my best!
The first time my hands started shaking, I was playing an audition. I played my piece nearly the best I had every played it. Suddenly, during my 3 octave scale, my hands started trembling. I increased the bow speed a bit, and that helped smooth out my sound, but my hands shook for a good 10 minutes afterwords. It happened again during my lesson, when I was playing a new piece for my teacher.
But this past week was where it really got bad.
I was at music camp, and on Monday of week 2, at 9:30 pm, the strings director gave me a small solo to play in the Gala. Blocking was at 10:00 am the next morning, and the piece needed to be nearly memorized by then. And it was - I got up at 6:00 am and practiced for an hour before breakfast. Learned it, and nearly nailed it except for one slightly out of tune shift. I was very pleased with myself!
The next day, Wednesday, we ran the show. I would feel fine, only a tad nervous, but that was because I was using a friend's violin (which was plugged in already) (Yes, I did borrow it and practice on it for a while.). Yet, when I got up to play, my hands shook. I thought it was the excitement of the lights. Thursday was Dress Rehearsal. Again, my hands shook. I was starting to freak out, because I could not perform it without my tone being ridiculously shaky. The fact that I couldn't get the violin to play the dynamics I wanted didn't help matters.
Friday was an off day, but I was busy with my Composition elective's performance, plus orchestra rehearsal. But I found time to assure myself that I could play in perfectly. I could - I went in a practice room and played each doublestop in tune, each shift smooth, and with so much emotion.
Saturday, we ran the show in the morning. My hands shook. In the afternoon, we did our camera's only show. I knew my hands would shake again, and was downright freaking out (Thankfully, by this point, I had learned my friend's violin better). The Final Gala... well, I played it a bit better than before, but I was nearly freaking out because I knew my hands would shake, my tone would be poor, and my confidence would be lost.
Overall, I actually did very well - the man who wrote my solo told me how beautiful I performed it, and the string director told me I had a "beautiful intuition" for the phrasing. Meanwhile, I sat there beating myself up over those 2 out of tune doublestops and my shaky tone. I nearly had myself in tears a couple of times.
I can't do that again. I nearly destroyed my confidence, and that nearly destroyed my playing. I have 2 questions to ask:
1) How can I keep my hands from shaking? (Without medication, please. I'm only 17.)
2) How can I keep from beating myself up over minute details?
I'd be most appreciative of any suggestions you might have!
Replies (12)
Some people prescribe a heavier bow for instances like this - I am currently trying out a 64 gram Louis Bazin that the dealer says is a good "audition bow," since the extra weight can help you stabilize your arm when you're nervous.
Honestly, my hands still shake during some solo and chamber performances (never during orchestra concerts), but I've found this to be less and less troublesome with the more performance experience I got - if anything, I like to be slightly nervous to add a bit more excitement to my playing.
During a recent performance, I noticed that my bow was shaking slightly on long held tones that were below mezzo-forte in dynamic; I compensated for this by moving my contact point closer to the fingerboard and using additional arm weight to make my bow steadier. I lost a few overtones, but I managed to keep the tone steady enough that nobody noticed my arm shaking besides myself.
"How can I keep my hands from shaking? (Without medication, please. I'm only 17.)"
I'd definitely recommend against medicating for this condition -- and not just because you're only 17. From what I read in another recent thread of yours, perfectionism seems to be a major problem here.
Try to perform often for people -- even if informally -- family, friends, a group at a retirement home. If you've had a bad experience with nerves, the best cure I can think of is go back ASAP and perform again -- and not have a bad experience this time.
What helped me as a kid just getting into recitals and auditions was to break the ice with a more energetic piece, something aggressive, to burn off adrenaline at the start. Later in the session, I could settle into more lyrical fare. As time passed, I didn't need to rely on this device as much. You might consider it as an interim measure for recitals and auditions, where you may have more control over sequence -- although it's often impractical in the type of show you mentioned.
I was lead violin for several of my high school's musical shows. I had plenty of adrenaline flowing, but I burnt it off and out-bullied the nerves. I had some of the best times of my musical life doing this. So keep at it. Even a little bit of a good experience can have a domino effect, too -- the kind you want. Hope this helps.
Hello, Emily,
I think you hit the reason right in the first two sentences you wrote: 'Excited to play". I have been performing in public for 45 years on many different instruments, mainly keyboards and guitars. I love standing before thousands of people when performing. I switched to violin recently and found that I too get excited to play this wonderful instrument, so much so that I begin to anticipate the next note or phrase before I finish the one I am on. When I do that, I also begin to shake. Not nerves, (again, audiences do not make me nervous)but I think anxiety to get to the next note, and when I do that, the bow begins to bounce and shake something awful. I cured that by relaxing and not rushing the note in anticipation of the next. In other words, I listen to myself, what I am playing 'in the moment' and enjoy the sound in 'real time', not worrying about what is next. I know with the amount of practice I do, the next note will be fine, so I just enjoy the note I am currently playing, relax, close my eyes, and I noticed that my hands have stopped shaking when I play. No need for meds, just enjoy 'the moment' and let the next note take care of itself.
Fresh sage
I started taking fresh sage for insomnia, it works really well if the mind is unable to calm down. I rarely get nervous on stage, but when I am playing the guitar and singing I tend to get really nervous and this nervousness will continue into the violin pieces. Fresh sage cured the problem, I take two fresh leaves two or three times a week.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16205785
http://www.livestrong.com/article/468700-sage-excessive-sweating/
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2003/09/030901091846.htm
Sage is a musician's wonder plant if it works for you.
A cup of Sage tea may also work for "teacher anxiety".
Excessive caffeine, sugar, white flour and alcohol will inflame nervousness.
Make sure any sage you eat is organic, no-spray, gluten-free, and dolphin safe.
Emily,
Do your hands shake at all when you are just alone in your room practicing? If the answer is no then we know that this does have something to do with either anxiety or too much adrenaline.
If your hands shake even while you are just practicing in your room alone I think that we first need to rule out any medical problems. Do both your hands shake or only your right hand.
Lisa S. - It's been over a year, but only at select times. I am slightly anemic, which could be making it worse.
Brian L. - I use a fairly heavy bow (CodaBow Diamond, Nickel), but I actually prefer my viola bow. I might try that. I perform a lot (I play fiddle as well as classical, and am always getting booked), but it only happens for classical events. I was able to smooth out my sound by using a bit of extra bow speed, but I was afraid to try anything more since I wasn't using my instrument and didn't know how it would react.
Jim H. - Performing doesn't bother me most of the time. Playing a faster tune to start off with usually helps me... unfortunately, I couldn't in this situation. The rest of the performance went extremely well, so I have lots of happy memories!
Sam G. - You know, my favorite performance ever happened because I put somehow got myself into a "just me and my violin" mode, where it was all about the music. I literally could not open my eyes, for fear of breaking the moment!
Charles C. and Paul D. - I may check into that if this continues.
Joel A. - No, not in the practice room. Once during lesson (though, ahem, that was easily explained why... it's a really bad idea to try to convince your teacher that you're ready for a harder piece by trying to learn and memorize it the night before your lesson.) Both hands shake, but I can hide the left hand by picking up my vibrato speed.
Emily,
Check these out:
The Inner Game of Music web page
Also, find the articles on the net regarding how to "practice for performance". That is a set of skills, usually neglected by teachers and not really supported by many fellow musicians. Do not allow yourself to be rushed to perform, ever. Keep performing. Accumulate neutral and positive experiences on stage. Learn from your mistakes and allow yourself to make them. Do not hold your breath and do move with the music, if you feel so. Meditate. Avoid stimulants, like coffee. It is OK to experience excitement, even anxiety - we just need to learn how to channel it into musical expression.
Rocky
Hi Emily,
I too am 17 and get lots of nerves!!
Then I found the book "The Inner Game of Music" which is amazing. It takes time to sink in and lots of practice but I am starting to feel the effects even though I have only been following the book for a matter of weeks.
Good luck! :)
Are you hands "only" shaky, or are they also cold? For me the two go together, and that negative feedback loop of, nerves make hands cold/shaky-->hear self play poorly-->nerves get worse-->hands get worse-->playing gets worse-->etc. is uncomfortably familiar. It helped me quite a bit to wear "wristies" (fingerless fleece gloves). Didn't get rid of the whole problem, but it short-circuited that particular feedback loop such that I was able to use the mental techniques that others have mentioned and talk myself down from the edge.
Emily, I really feel for you. My only advice is to follow that which others have given you here. This problem is all in your mind, as it is in the minds of all of us who suffer from it. Next year, when you are legally adult, if it is still a problem you could get medicinal help.
I too was just 17 back in 1951 when the shakes first hit my right arm during a violin performance. It was the lowest-risk performance I had ever done (up to then, or since); playing a few old-English ditties for my senior high-school English class. I had no idea what was going on; my Mom named it "stage fright" after I told her about it. Over the years it only got worse and by my late 20s it started to affect my cello performances. It only bothered me when I know I would be heard, orchestral playing was never a problem and I had become concertmaster of my community orchestra by the late 1960s. I did manage to get through some solo passages unscathed - but not all!
It wasn't until 1977, when I was participating in the San Diego Chamber Music Workshop that they held a round-table discussion of "Stage Fright" with participants from a range of the performing arts that I learned that this problem is ubiquitous. The auditorium was filled with virtually every performing musician from San Diego and its environs - not just the workshop participants. The solution I learned of there was medical (a very small dose of a beta blocker, like Inderal that suppresses the adrenalin response), for which my Dr. gave me a Rx after I returned home - and it's worked ever since. And I never shook in solo performance again. It was actually an audience member who brought up this "cure" and the medical doctor on the round-table panel did not want to discuss it - but he did anyway and added that vomiting prior to performance (as soprano Lily Pons did) also suppresses the adrenalin response.
I also have an essential tremor that has gotten worse over the years and this medical aid also helps that - I notice when performing under its influence, although I could not take it on a regular basis for other medical reasons. One of my delights now, when I can perform without shaking has been to bow slowly as close to the frog as it is possible to get - just because I can.
I know this is not the way you want to fix the problem. I know of people who solved their stage fright problem this way, and then realized in a visceral way that it was all in their minds, and were able to perform just as well without the medical help and have done so ever since. But it is good to know that it is available as an ultimate backup. (For all I know the 5mg (1/4 of a pill) that I take is working more as a placebo anyway.)
Andy
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July 26, 2012 at 01:12 AM · If this is a new problem it might be wise to go see your doctor. There are medical issues, often endocrine, that can cause your hands to shake, especially if there's even a little adrenaline involved (like when performing!) After that, look at more music-related solutions.