Mindfulness in the Violin Studio: Teaching with a 'Soft Gaze'
As I finish another conservatory year teaching at the pre-college of the San Francisco Conservatory of Music, I have been thinking about the importance of a more mindful focus. While many tasks pile up around juries and recitals, especially at the end of the year, I must still fully focus my energy and be present at every lesson. I also feel this as a homeschooling parent at the end of the year, with state testing and end-of-year exams. The more that needs to be done on any given day, the more I need to check my mindset, my tone, and how I am relating to whoever is in the room.
Lately I have read about the importance of a soft gaze and meditation, and it brought me back to when I used to soul-gaze with my children when they were babies. I would sit them on my lap and we would have the loveliest gazing sessions with one another. It would calm us both. Now they are both middle schoolers, seeking independence and full of a different kind of energy… Still, I wish I could somehow place them on my lap and gaze for a while. It would do us all so much good.
"Softening your gaze" is considered a game-changer for maintaining a mindful, balanced perception of the world around us. It also aids in feeling grounded and centering our focus. While hardening or intensifying our gaze in the face of challenge might seem intuitive, the opposite has proven more fruitful. Just look up "soft focus" or "quiet eyes" and read how Olympians and professional athletes use these techniques to elevate their statistical averages for things like free throws or putts. Something about quieting their eyes reduces distraction and gives way to a deeper focus, raising their awareness to factors that improve their rate of success.
But for so many of us, our gaze is often hard and fixed, without knowing it. We are living in states of flight-or-flight, with schedules maxed out and very little breathing time between activities. This hampers our consistency as players, or our ability to impart information as teachers and parents. We are also frequently and inexplicably glued to our phones, even as we strive to connect and focus deeply. Teachers struggle with managing distractions during lessons, and even the parents are multitasking in the studio during lesson time. It hardens our gaze, to be looking for that notification or text coming in; it puts us in that "fight or flight" mode, waiting for the next "alert."
Next year I will implement a "no smart phone in the studio" rule. It hits me that we all survived just fine in lessons during the 80's, when teachers, parents and students had no smartphones or internet to alert them to outside needs or emergencies. My own mother ran a full piano studio during my entire childhood. We had a landline only. If it was important (which it rarely was), she excused herself for a moment. She was not able to text, view notifications, or check email while teaching because none of that existed...and we all survived.
As much as we feel the need to stay connected, perhaps going old-school would actually help us connect more deeply to the people we are working with, as well as the music. Being constantly available is not a sign of prestige. How about making yourself unavailable? Put an auto-reply message on your email, and make it clear to those around you that during these hours you will only be available if there is an emergency. This indicates a respect and commitment to your work and the people coming to you. It also shifts you away from fight-or-flight mode, checking for that next text or notification. The opportunity arises then to be mindful and grounded, opening the door for a softer gaze toward your student - or your teacher, or your child.
I have been trying to shift to a softer gaze both in my own parenting and also in the studio where I teach at conservatory for a few months now.
As a parent of a young artist, I struggle with wanting things to get done at a certain time in our house, and that can cause tension. Looking at my child with a softer gaze has shifted our first interactions in the day and invited more empathy into our space. It yields instant connection which then leads to happier teamwork as we make our way through school and practice together.
As a teacher, shifting my gaze from hard to soft while observing my students has transformed the room. A previously tense and stale room became aerated and energized. Students may arrive in a fight-or-flight state, but a soft gaze helps regulate them, so that they can find a more ideal disposition for learning.
When I urge a student to shift from a hard to soft gaze when looking at scores, I see an even bigger shift. They notice more details in the score that had previously escaped their attention. Their ability to innovate, craft a beautiful phrase, or troubleshoot their technique all increases. There is also a vibe of open exploration that hits the room, helping every aspect of the learning process.
A hard gaze at the music stand sees only the obvious, succumbing to preconceived notions of difficulty or challenge. It can feel rigid and prematurely judgmental. It is a human tendency to approach difficulty with a hard gaze. It's how we might approach a traffic jam, or a hard math equation, or a difficult diagnosis. It can also be how we see chores or tasks we would rather not do. It limits our ability to think outside the box, produces tension and creates rigidity.
If a teacher observes a student with a hard gaze, it can place the student in an instantly defensive position. When observing students with a soft gaze, we are looking at the whole child, listening to their point of view with a curious and open mind, and considering everything they are putting out there with a broader brush. They can feel this, and it helps make them more fluid, open, and brave.
Some thoughts for how to implement this in a studio would be to ask students how they perceive their gaze to be when they are looking at a piece of music. How about an etude, an unaccompanied work, a caprice, or a new work? This can raise awareness and help them ponder how this might be affecting their work. Ask them how we might keep a soft gaze longer. Once they are trying a softer gaze in their practice and noticing the effects, ask them how this feels different and what they are noticing take place in their practice.
A softer gaze also builds trust, connection, and aids in acquisition and retention of information. An open, trusting, and curious child can astound you with what they can accomplish, both in lessons and in practice.
Perhaps Shakespeare’s quote, "The eyes are the window to the soul," should be in every violin studio.
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You are absolutely right.
The simplest way to achive soft gaze is taking glasses off if you wear them. They are designed to hold the eye in one position making it almost impossible to get a soft gaze.
Cheers,
Buri
I relate to the feeling of being on “alert” all the time, and what a relief it can be to dispense with that by just leaving the phone in another room. If I forget to turn off the volume and something buzzes or rings during a lesson I just yell at the phone, “Be quiet, it’s Susie’s lesson!” But I would like to spend more time away from the phone, whether teaching or not!
Thank you, Amy Beth, the soft gaze benefits both the teacher and the student!
I have had a no phones policy in my studio for years and while it was tricky at the start - and still occasionally people forget-, now I think it is clear to everyone how much easier it is to concentrate and to relax during the lesson. That definitely makes for better lessons for the student and better teaching from me.
The next step for me is being more grounded during playing: taking off shoes and playing in socks or barefoot. The effect on tone production is just mind-blowing!
During the pandemic I made a series of YouTube lessons about mindfulness in violin playing - violin yoga if you like. I explored this subject further by practising an awareness of the space in front of the violin player, where your arms operate. It has been fascinating to explore. The soft gaze is definitely the beginning of this process. It brings an open mind and a non-judgemental approach to the practice, where feeling and exploration and concentration are the central building blocks. Thank you!
If you want to check the Mindfulness for Violin Players series, click here: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PL54Fx8wLxTClDLzEAxsvf1b-00yNYiIG1&si=JMOS5hW0_hBc9anH
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May 15, 2024 at 12:48 AM · Great article! I love the idea of soft gaze. I agree that we all lived very nicely without cellphones, etc., back in the 80s and even most of the 90s, but I would be afraid to initiate a no-cellphone rule. Too many of my parents have had emergency calls during lessons or other children at home alone. Plus, people are addicted to their phones and I don’t want anyone feeling uncomfortable or that I’m treating them like adolescents. I think it would be fabulous if we could get assisting parents to volunteer to turn their phones off though. Maybe try a bit of soft gazing on them? Good idea to turn our own phones off however. Lately I have been leaving my phone in other parts of the house so I can feel less connected to it and more connected to myself. Again, a lovely article. I have never heard of soft gazing, but now I’ll try it! Thanks Amy Beth!