The winning Schoenburger, at last!

December 11, 2008, 9:52 AM ·

Thank you to all of the participants in the first-ever (that I know of) Schoenburger recipe contest, suggested by violinist.com member Stephen Brivati. I enjoyed reading the submissions.

Congratulations to 14-year-old winner Sayre P.! This recipe may be sweeter than Schoenberg’s reputation, but it’s imaginative and thoughtful. According to reliable sources, Schoenberg loved birthdays – so I just had to honor this entry. Here’s the winner:

In honor of Arnold Schoenberg’s 134th birthday on September 13th, my Schoenburger is a sweet and delectable “birthday burger.” My recipe follows:

Bun- sponge cake, frosted with maple brown sugar icing, topped with Rice Krispies in place of sesame seeds

Burger patty- chocolate cake coated with Oreo crumbs

Lettuce- green gummy worms

Pickles- kiwi

Cheese- a slab of the sponge cake, slathered with yellow sprinkles

Ketchup- strawberry sauce

Mustard- yellow apricot sauce

And you can’t forget a candle to sing Mr. S “Happy Birthday!”

So, why use the ingredients I chose? Here are some of my reasons:

Gummy worms are hard to chew, which reminds me of Schoenberg’s Fantasy for Violin and Piano- it has unusual chords and fingering in the violin part

Rice Krispies are my favorite cereal, and I eat them most every day- just like I “digest” Schoenberg’s music on a daily basis

Chocolate cake is a favorite “food” of Americans, similar to Schoenberg’s “Weihnachtmusik” is a traditional Christmas song

Kiwi skins are tough on the outside, like a first impression of Schoenberg. But once you get past that and learn about his past, you will find his reasoning for his style of composure, and really start to enjoy his music- just like you enjoy the sweet meat of the kiwi after you get past the skin

The dark Oreo crumbs represent a badly cooked patty, which aligns with one of Schoenberg’s famous quotes: “My music is not modern, it is merely badly played.”

Finally, my burger was overcooked for exactly 13 minutes- representing Schoenberg’s triskaidekaphobia, or fear of the number 13, which may have been the root of his death

And because not everyone’s experiences with Schoenberg are positive, I award an honorable mention to the final words of 22-year-old Daniel Fuchs’s recipe:

"When you have finished creating your Schoenburger, don’t be disappointed if it tastes disgusting. This is absolutely normal. There are two ways to deal with that problem:

First, you can try the burger again and again. Perhaps one day you might like it. Perhaps you aren’t mature enough for it yet.

Second, you can just tell other people you like it very much. Probably they will admire your intelligent and progressive taste. ;)"

Replies

Brian Hong

December 11, 2008 at 04:51 PM ·

Mrs. Hahn, thank you for this. What an insightful and creative 14 year old to come up with a recipe like that.

Dimitri Musafia

December 11, 2008 at 05:13 PM ·

That was a lot of fun!

Now, one of Schoenberg's more notorious pupils was born on Sept. 5, and I'm referring to John Cage. Maybe we should try making a recipe for his birthday too.

I humbly submit my entry already, should someone take the initiative and set up such a contest.

Ingredients: nothing. Time to prepare: exactly 4' 33". Cooking temperature? Hmm... no, got it: minus 273°C!

Tom Holzman

December 11, 2008 at 05:21 PM ·

Ms. Hahn - I love the recipe and hope you avoid the "indigestion" many of us get when listening to Schoenberg's music. There was a reason why in Nazi Germany the Jewish Kulturbund Orchestra could not get folks to come to concerts where they played his music, even though it was some of the limited repertoire the Nazis permitted. Anyhow, I admire those who like his music and get pleasure out of it. Happy B'day Arnold.

Royce Faina

December 11, 2008 at 05:28 PM ·

The creativity shown in this recipe! I love it too much!

And good to hear from you Maestra Hahn!

Bill Busen

December 11, 2008 at 08:36 PM ·

Finally, my burger was overcooked for exactly 13 minutes

But the temperatures for the first twelve minutes are randomly chosen and all different?

Stephen Brivati

December 11, 2008 at 09:42 PM ·

Greetings,

I am finally immortalized!

Ms. Hahn, will be at your Ives concert in Nagoya. If I syand up and shoud `Schoenburger do you promise to wave?`

Cheers,

Buri

Laurie Niles

December 11, 2008 at 10:16 PM ·

By the way, congratulations on your Grammy nomination for Best Classical Album for the Schoenberg and Sibelius album!

Pauline Lerner

December 11, 2008 at 10:19 PM ·

Ms. Hahn, Thanks for your article about the recipe contest. That was really fun, and the winning response was very creative. Dimitri, I love your recipe in honor of John Cage. Beethoven's birthday is coming up soon. I think we need a recipe for him.