T-Shirt Slogans

April 16, 2006 at 06:47 AM · In honor of Emily saying "Not everybody can be elitist," I wanted to start a thread for the best thing you've ever said that ought to be on a T-shirt. Not something you've seen on a T-shirt, but some original thing that came out of your noodle. Or maybe it can be something someone on V.com said!

Robert reminded me of when I innocently asked at a long-ago Thanksgiving dinner, "Does everybody think I'm paranoid?" He never let me forget it!

Replies (73)

April 16, 2006 at 08:32 AM · I'm not slack, I just work full-time part of the time.


April 16, 2006 at 09:43 AM · hmmm never mind

April 16, 2006 at 12:45 PM · I must be right because I am always right.


My intonation is correct. I'm just using expressive intonation.

April 16, 2006 at 12:59 PM · I always wanted to play violin in the worst way...and now I do.

April 16, 2006 at 01:08 PM · My other violin is a Strad

April 16, 2006 at 10:12 PM · Hinéh mah tov, Look! How good and how

Umah na'im, pleasant it is

Shevet ahim for brothers to dwell

Gam yahad. together in unity!

Source: Lenny Bernstein, finale Chichester Psalms


April 16, 2006 at 03:03 PM · Hansjurgen, beautiful!

David, classic!

(btw David Ormai are you by any chance related to Gabor Ormai, former violist of the Takacs??)

My own contribution, something our first violinist said at quartet rehearsal last week: "Relaxation is for the Weak". :)

April 16, 2006 at 04:34 PM · I'm actually selling this one on cafepress (http://www.cafepress.com/dsch):

"I'm funny and smart! You can tell by my t-shirt"

April 16, 2006 at 05:15 PM · Mine isn't music related but it's in honor of having the best English teacher (and AP English teacher) out there! To give a bit of background though, he started a tradition known as pink Thursday at my school around 15 years ago so every Thursday he and all the other male teachers who teach English wear pink. If you wear pink into my teachers class on a Thursday you are instantly "smarter" and recieve a caramel. As tradition goes, my teacher's graduation AP class comes up with something interesting for a new pink shirt and saying for him. Last year he recieved "Basket Weaving 101" and "Nicaragua" as those were two popular things that continually come up in the class as a humor element. This year, my class is the graduating class and some of us have gotten stuck on the T.S. Eliot poem "The Hollow Men" which we studied in the class the previous year. So what have we come up with?

"This is the way the world ends, not with a bang but AP class."

April 16, 2006 at 06:49 PM · Sounds like some great G rated fun....

April 16, 2006 at 06:59 PM · I have a dozen t-shirt ideas, but they are all pertaining to my kitchen job. I'll share a couple after coffee.

April 16, 2006 at 07:18 PM · Ever seen those choir t-shirts that say, "Hold me - I'm a fermata." ?

How about this.

"Stroke me lightly - I'm a flautando."

April 16, 2006 at 10:15 PM · Mine would be 'slow practice'


April 16, 2006 at 10:23 PM · I saw a t-shirt that says E = Fb (flat)

April 17, 2006 at 02:49 AM · Robert Niles, LOL! Reminds me of: "I'm an atheist, I swear to God!" and "I think I'm an agnostic, but I'm not really sure..." :)

April 17, 2006 at 01:26 PM · Ah Nicholas!

April 17, 2006 at 04:54 PM · Robert and Maura, along the same lines, I like

"I'm a militant agnostic. I don't know, and neither do you."

April 17, 2006 at 09:58 PM · I'm a nonmilitant nonsmoker

or (less personal)

front: 'TONI'


Where is General Sherman when he is needed the most ?

April 18, 2006 at 01:39 PM · Hi,

also not from the realm of music, but great nevertheless:

"There's 10 kind of people - those who understand binary and those who don't".

Bye, Juergen

April 19, 2006 at 02:51 PM · I saw a kid with this on his t-shirt the other day:

For sale - My parents. Buy one, get one free.

But, OK, original....

Wanna make beautiful music? Come up to my flat.

Scroll down to learn to play violin upside-down.

I play violin, but think of me as an ordinary person.

I slow down for adagios.

April 19, 2006 at 03:27 PM · Saw this one somewhere and it's very true:


April 19, 2006 at 03:28 PM · I also still love Ilya's quote: "I have religious beliefs against allergies. And am allergic to religious beliefs. And I still hate vodka." :)


April 19, 2006 at 04:50 PM · I'm not joking, I've seen a black T-shirt printed with...

b o o b

around the chest area and accordingly there are the words Flat/Semibreve/Semibreve/Flat underneath those 4 "symbols".

April 20, 2006 at 12:35 AM · Lick my hemiola

April 20, 2006 at 12:56 AM · The other day there was an attractive young woman with a shirt that said "Strangers have the best candy."

As for funny ones we make up ourselves...how about "Vote Republican." Ahhahahahahaaaa!!

April 20, 2006 at 02:31 AM · "Politics: Poly = many; tics = bloodsucking insects."

April 20, 2006 at 09:42 PM · "got music?"

"hold me! im a fermata"

April 21, 2006 at 12:04 AM · "Pineapple

... you had to be there."


April 21, 2006 at 12:31 AM · How about, "People who think they know everything annoy those of us who do."

April 21, 2006 at 06:21 AM · If I opened a brewery here at the Bible camp I work at, I would call it Solid Rock Brewery and I would sell t-shirts that say, "What would Jesus brew?"

No, of course I would never do that. I'm joking. But I have to confess the thought did occur to me one night.

April 21, 2006 at 11:09 AM · Hey c'mon - we all know Jesus would be making wine, not beer. He did turn the water into wine, and served wine at the last supper.

Personally, I like to think that Jesus would make a mean Cabernet Merlot.

April 21, 2006 at 03:16 PM · Everyone's plotting to convince me I'm paranoid.

April 21, 2006 at 03:21 PM · Oh, nice one Sander! :)


April 21, 2006 at 03:25 PM · That reminds me of something I saw among graffiti on a fence on my college campus some years ago:

Help, help, the paranoids are after me!

April 21, 2006 at 03:26 PM · Apparently they don’t make the “I’d Rather Be Playing String Quartets” bumper sticker anymore

“When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Practicing”

similar to Enosh’s “Musicians Theory of Relativity: E=Fb”

"I brake for G.P's"

April 21, 2006 at 04:00 PM · Guitars Rock

Violins Rule!

April 21, 2006 at 08:54 PM · - It's not the school, it's the Principal of the thing.

- If you got a new G string you wouldn't go flat.

- I play second fiddle for anybody.

- If you're so smart, let's see you play fingered octaves.

- Smile if you can play Introduction and Rondo Capriccioso.

- Your car and your violin both need a tune-up.

- Violinists do it with rosin. (...ick!)

- "I'm just having a bad hair day" - Beethoven

- Want to touch my instrument?

April 22, 2006 at 06:20 PM · Really a lot of great ideas. I'll have to select the best ones and really make t-shirts out of them.

It's not a funny one, but recently I made myself a t-shirt with

Johann Sebastian



printed on it, the Bach very large, the rest small. I have so many t-shirts of my favorite bands so I figured I needed one showing my favorite composer, too. People in the streets were looking quite strange at me, great!


April 22, 2006 at 06:43 PM · Nice! I should make a Takacs Quartet T-shirt......well, they are my favorite band! :)


April 22, 2006 at 07:50 PM · Picture of a fermata, along with a rit.

Hold me, retard.

April 23, 2006 at 12:34 PM · Sander: "violinists do it with rosin" ??

I think we should think of a different one for violinists. Some suggestions:

Violinists do it every day.

Violinists do it with their fingers.

Violinists do it with smooth strokes.

Violinists do it again and again until it's perfect.

April 23, 2006 at 02:31 PM · Violinists do it in the practice rooms?

April 23, 2006 at 05:45 PM · Hi,

Maura, depends on which school you go to...


April 23, 2006 at 06:38 PM · I dunno if anyone else has seen it but there's a list of 10 reasons to date a violinist (or I guess violist would work too) but the two i remember off it are "Violinists can go for hours and not get tired" and "They're not afraid to get white stuff on them"

The other 8 were probably equally as bad, but those are the ones I remember.

The best shirt I saw in a store (not pertaining to anything musical) was these three stick figures around a camp fire, and two had hot dogs on a stick over the fire, and the third one just had a sad face. The caption underneath was "It's all fun and games until someone loses a wiener."

My greatest regret is not buying that shirt.

April 23, 2006 at 06:46 PM · Oh yeah, another one off that list was "They know just how to tighten or loosen a g-string"

April 23, 2006 at 09:13 PM · Yeah, how about:

Violinists do it in every position.

Violinists do it with vibrato.

Violinists do it without scratching.

Violinists can do it fast or slow.

Violinists do it in front of an audience.

Violinists can do it sitting or standing.

Cheers, Sandy

April 24, 2006 at 12:24 AM · QUESTION TONALITY

April 24, 2006 at 01:43 AM · ooh good one Tavani! :)

April 24, 2006 at 02:02 AM · That's a bumper sticker, fool.

Ahh...lesee..."Official G string inspector." Nah.

April 24, 2006 at 07:56 PM · "Not everybody can be a snob." Nah.

April 28, 2006 at 04:51 AM · "Land of the flea, home of the plague."

April 28, 2006 at 04:57 AM · a yellow t-shirt that says "barn"

April 29, 2006 at 01:07 AM · A little sadism never hurt anybody.

April 29, 2006 at 01:13 PM · ...which brings to mind this one from a B. Kliban cartoon:

The friend queried the masochist,

"Why do you hang around that sadist?"

"...beats me!"

(Sorry, I didn't tell it right the first time, apologies to Nei and all)

April 29, 2006 at 05:53 AM · which leads further down the trail to the old joke of:

"The masochist says, 'Beat me! Beat me!'

The sadist says, 'No.' "


April 29, 2006 at 03:24 PM · Violinists can do it for hours on end in 10 different positions...

...sorry, that was bad

April 29, 2006 at 04:33 PM · *Groannnn*......good one! :)

April 29, 2006 at 07:08 PM · Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you!

April 30, 2006 at 07:33 PM · I'm one bad audition away from having thirty cats.

April 30, 2006 at 09:17 PM · These are all really funny.

One that I find funny but not music related is:

"Drink Apple Juice. OJ will kill you."

April 30, 2006 at 11:00 PM · Cheesey, but seen on a T-Shirt...

"Play violin, not vile din"

May 1, 2006 at 07:09 AM · Saw this:

I'm the reason you practice...

May 1, 2006 at 10:37 AM · What use are questions anyway?

May 1, 2006 at 05:06 PM · One that I saw and really liked said:

Stop reading my shirt

I also had one that said "I see dumb people"

It was cool at the time.

May 1, 2006 at 11:40 PM · I once saw a t-shirt that said ,

(Front) " If you want to know how to stop being an idiot look on the back."

(Back)" If you want to know how to stop being an idiot look on the front"

May 2, 2006 at 12:40 AM · (Front) "Back"

(Back) "Front"

May 2, 2006 at 12:56 AM · Well if we're going down that line...

(front) The conductor's fantastic

(back) if only i could see where he puts the beats.

May 2, 2006 at 01:09 PM · We have more to look forward to in the future than we do in the past.

I'm the Undecider.

I'm looking at yours, too.

May 2, 2006 at 03:12 PM · My favourite late '70s tshirt was:

"We are the people our parents warned us about"


May 3, 2006 at 12:36 PM · I think this one is particularly applicable to music students like many of us. : )

"Baroque: when you are out of money."

May 5, 2006 at 12:50 AM · This t-shirt is NOT for sale at $9.95, tax included.

CYA (Cover Your Actions)

May 6, 2006 at 11:47 PM · "How do you get to Carnegie Hall? You take the Holland Tunnel...then the Lincoln Tunnel...then the Carpal Tunnal..."

May 7, 2006 at 04:53 AM · Honk if you love Cheeze Whiz

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