When I began playing the violin again I wasn't very into it- I loved it but it was more of a hobby. Then, junior year of high school I felt some kind of a spark which continued to increase to the point where I would to love the make violin my career. My high school had no orchestra or string group of any kind so I was very happy when I found out from my theatre teacher that there would be a string quartet. I auditioned and I got in. To my luck, the quartet kicked off the year I left so I was never really "in" it.
I voiced my interest in majoring in music during my senior year. This thought was met well by my mother (though she was concerned about financial aspects) and met by a rather unpleasant reaction by my father (which we will not go into details about xD). My father called the musical director at my school asking whether I had talent or not. The teacher said he saw nothing special. I asked my violin teacher and she said "not only do you have talent but you have the determination and the drive."
This has brought me to the question: what is musical talent? How is it different from passion? How can I identify this in myself? Regardless of how my many teachers say I do/don't have talent I'll never believe until I believe it, until I see it for myself.
In regards to passion: In my last blog I expressed how shocked and angry I was that the piece I've been working on sounded horrible after working on it for a while. This made me wonder: if I really do have talent why am I not better? Am I just tragically chasing a dream that cannot come true? Every time I watch a video on YouTube of a musical or orchestra/solo performance I want to be on that stage or in that orchestra. I want it so bad that I actually hurts. And it hurts more when I know it will never be me.
Also, how to creativity, talent and passion differ?
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