I'm sooo up and down with my playing at the moment. If i play scales and exercises for, say, half an hour, i sound really good, my intonation is great, I don't tense up, my sense of rhythm is intact and I can pull a straight bow. Otherwise though I'm a mess. I feel like I'll never be good enough to have a career in music - I want to play in orchestras and travel about giving concerts with a quartet or trio perhaps and get really passionate and into my music but noone I know in college seems to care that much.
And I'm struggling to hit more than 2hrs a day practice because of my timetable. It's soooo bloomin depressing!!!!!!
Okay rant over... starting Shostakovich 8 in quartet which is fantastic - can't wait - makes a exciting change from early Haydn. And I'm playing in the Villa Lobos chorus 7 (i think) which is cool - sightread through it earlier with the cellist and it rocks! And we played through Shostakovich 5 in orchestral repertoire yesterday which was really enjoyable and challenging - was exhausted after but in a good way.
Have to make sure I get my vitamins every day now otherwise i get soo tired. Find it really hard to sleep at the minute tho - annoying immature noisy ppl in my halls being annoying and immature and noisy...and I'm a bit stressed.
All I'm working on at the minute are scales and orchestral excerpts and 1 kreutzer - feels like 4yrs (or 3 and 2/3) is never going to be enough to master half the standard violin repertoire - I want to be able to play all the big concerti and sonatas and solo pieces aswell as the Bach s&ps...
I told my teacher i wanted to work on bow technique but he didn't seem that keen on doing anything that wasn't directly related to my bi-annual exam in February or pieces I've started (ie nothing really) whereas I'd love to work on loads of technical stuff for a while so i feel like i'm more equipped to deal with all areas of performance, be it solo, orchestral or chamber. He even said kreutzers are a waste of time and he doesnn't really see the point in doing studies for the sake of it. I guess he does know best being a top notch orchestral leader, but I was expecting to do a lot more technique in 1st year. And it's not like I'm not progressing with the stuff he does give me - my intonation improved dramatically almost overnight, I always use a metronome now and it shows, i think, and my scales are all coming on well. My study, he said, is nearly ready for my exam already so i don't need to worry about it, and my orchestral excerpts won't take too long as they're all from stuff we're playing anyway. My teacher himself said i pick up things very quickly, which i do. I guess I can just keep taking exercises from Simon Fischer if i'm really bored but..... i just want more of a challenge than double stop scales at the minute... oh well - once I've got all of them perfectly in tune and learnt all my current repertoire perfectly I can say something.....just full of nervous energy at the moment. night night everyone... time to kip, if i can sleep - maybe i need pills?? anyway....have a good day whereever you are!
Violinist.com is made possible by...
Discover the best of Violinist.com in these collections of editor Laurie Niles' exclusive interviews.