August 11, 2004 at 9:07 PM

I'm so excited I'm jumping out of my skin. JUMP JUMP JUMP skin is so thin...anyhow. My best friend cellist will be here any moment. I haven't seen her since last fall. I practiced a lot this morning...recorded the Bach all the way through and for some reason it sounded good.? How did that happen? I didn't stop for mistakes or edit...just plowed through and it was o.k. I got a new soundcard a few days ago and it makes everything a new sparkling shade of violin. I'm tending to want to think that instead of making me sound better than I do...lying so to speak, that it is actually closer to the truth. I can live delusionally for awhile.....I think I was relaxed, too. Because I was just playing for fun not analyzing every single note to decide whether or not I was going to keep the take. Anyhow. Love you all! Yes, school is expensive. I was lucky and the government payed most of my undergraduate-ness. I was so poor...and they knew it. And scholorships from my days of "I want to be the best student and prove to everyone that I am worth something" in high school. I wonder if that is still there underneath all of the "I don't care, I'd rather just learn learn learn and whatever grade..." I know it must be a combination now. Whatever. I'm done with classes, so now I just have fallen in love with my computer. A great learning tool. You can connect with everything everyone and all information. How conveinient for nonsleepers like myself. Oh. I did take out one loan. To buy my violin. Partly from the school and partly from my grandparents...I only owe them 300 more dollars, though. I still owe the school a few thousand. And a few thousand more. Then add a few thousand. I like to pay real people first. Plus, I've been in school FOREVER so they haven't really asked for it yet....the day will come. In december add a few months of grace period. Then I will be groveling on the street for money or perhaps playing with my case open with a sign that says "help me pay for this service" or sell my body on a street corner. Hm. Anyhow. I'm hyper as hyper can be. Later guys.

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August 11, 2004 at 9:07 PM

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