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February 2009

A Shattered Portrait

February 6, 2009 10:23

Yesterday as I sat at the end of my State test (UBSCT), thoughts such as I'm never going to be this young again... Everytime I don't do something that I want, the oppurtunity is gone forever.

If you've been a frequent reader of my blogs, you'll know that I've kept a personal journal for quite a long time. Well, I've decided to adapt that process. Yesterday, in one of my blank leather journals, I started to write my own version of memoirs. I started from the first day that my relationship with music strengthened to a volcanic level. Describing every detail... The smells, sounds, colors of the room. I would share with you the first time that this relationship blossomed, but it's so personal to me and I'm not really ready to share it with a large group of people.

I labeled this new book A Shattered Portrait Reborn. The proccess of beginning to write down my most crisp and intense memories so that I will have them forever, maybe sharing them with others eventually, was such a well-worth-it process. After the first four pages, I felt so relieved that I kept going and by the end of the night I felt so happy to have these strong memories down on paper.

I'm not really sure what I would label it as, but the closest thing that I think of it as is a series of memoirs. Each one somewhat different while still connected. They tell the stories of triumphs and struggles. Times where after an event, I felt the feelings swarming within myself so powerful that playing the violin was the only way to get  them out. My connection with Bach and Tchaikovsky's music. That which lay underneath it.

I sat for hours last night, reading through my personal journals. From the first one to the most recent, recalling memories that I will write about soon.

This is just something that I've started doing and thought I'd share with you all. :)

On a sidenote, the novel that I'm reading, almost done with.. On the last ten pages or so.. Is the best that I think I've ever read. It's The Secret Life of Bees and I encourage all of you to read it if you haven't yet done so. It's been one of the only novels that has made me sad  when it's end comes.

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