Introducing the Perfect Orchestral Matchmaker: 'StandPartners Only'

April 1, 2022, 10:20 AM · We all know there's a lot of bad standpartners out there. But what if it was possible to find the perfect standpartner for everyone?

Someone who chose the same fingering options as you, and perfectly matched your internal rhythm and intonation?

There is. Meet Standpartners Only!

After completing a short survey, and analyzing over 1 million data points about your playing preferences, hygiene, body posture, and accuracy of intonation, the algorithm will match you with the player that perfectly compliments you.

But that's not all!

With "Standpartners Only ~ Premium," we're disrupting the global orchestral audition process. No more nerve-wracking auditions and costly flights just to play 30 seconds of bad excerpts.

We put the "U" and "I" in tutti.

Players can apply for positions worldwide from the comfort of their home. Orchestras can find the perfect candidate from a global database of performers without holding days of auditions.

Our mission is to make the world a better place, one standpartner at a time.

Start your free trial Today!

Replies

Paul Deck

April 2, 2022 at 01:45 PM · Very clever, Michael. :)

John Rokos

April 8, 2022 at 02:46 PM · How can you expect an April Fool's joke like this to succeed when it has a fallacy in it like "from the comfort of your own home"? Are you so stupid you don't realise that some people's homes just ARE NOT COMFORTABLE?

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