March 2008

pearls of wisdom

March 22, 2008 23:48

Just when I think I have things figured out and start to feel secure in my own directions with everything, things start to happen that throw that balance and sense of direction all out of wack. Order becomes chaos. Chaos can be wonderful and most of the time I enjoy things more if they tend to be a little more out of place.It keeps things interesting and adds a sense of spontaneity and surprise to otherwise mundane and repetitive tasks and objectives but order and organization in at least some areas is entirely necessary in order to stay sane.

Random interjection for one's own amusement ..... there are only so many times you can knock a clock off a table (well in my case a chair - I don't have a bedside table) before it no longer functions as a time keeping device.

Anyone who's ever lived in or visited Vancouver for any length of time knows that it can get pretty dreary and ugly here when it rains for days on end. On the other hand if you've been here at all, you'll also know it's one of the most beautiful places to be when the weather is good. Today the weather is quite lovely out and spring is very much in the air! I just couldn't resist getting outside and down to the beach while the tide was out. One thing I love about this city is you can go to beaches like Wreck Beach or Jericho Beach or Spanish Banks and forget you're even in a city. It's so calm and peaceful (when there aren't lots of people around) with the sounds of the birds and other sea life and the smell of the ocean around to greet you. There aren't the sirens or traffic and noise of the city and at some of the beaches there isn't even a view of the city buildings so it's really like you're in a completely different place and I love it!

As my first year of university comes to a close I find myself thinking about how quickly the year has gone and about all the experiences and people I've met. When I think about it I really wonder how I've managed to cram so much into such a short space of time and how I've managed to still come out on top somehow. It's funny how the mind can cope and navigate all the obstacles that are presented. There was so much that I was never prepared for at all this year, and maybe you're never prepared for it but it's certainly been a huge growing period for me this year.

Anyways, I'll close off for now and leave you with a picture from the beach. :)

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March 9, 2008 10:33

Have you ever had one of those moments where there's something you want to say but you just can't find the vocabulary to express it and it propels you towards frustration? It's kind of like trying to communicate with someone who's native language is not one you speak fluently. You can get the point across but you can't really fully express or effectively communicate your ideas because you don't know and understand and breathe the subtleties of the language. It's like playing a scale without vibrato, it's good for practicing intonation and technique but it's boring to listen to on its own. Lately I feel like I'm having a lot of those moments and so far nothing is really helping me get my point across and somewhere in the chaos i'm not really sure what my point is anymore or what exactly I was trying to say in the beginning. I feel like I'm running in circles with my thoughts because I just can't get beyond them to express them in a justifiable way. A way that fully communicates what they mean to me! It's irritating!!!

Now for a "finish the sentence"... Opera is..... or maybe more specifically modern opera is....... (fill in the blanks)
This past month I've had more than enough of my life consumed by opera. Opera rehearsals, opera dress rehearsals and opera performances. Maybe if I actually enjoyed the opera I was playing in I'd feel differently but for my first big performance of opera music I wasn't exactly left feeling like I ever wanted to play another opera. The set was pretty cool and some of the singers were amazing but I don't really get to enjoy that aspect much when I'm sitting in a whole in the ground encased by concrete which amplifies the sound of all the instruments, especially the brass.
I'll be happy to be getting back to "normal" orchestral repertoire this next week to say the least.

Tis the season of recitals. I've been invited to so many and asked to play in just as many! It's so hard to pick which ones to go and which ones to pass by. I've agreed to perform in Faure's requiem which will be exciting! Two performances of it at the Chan Centre! And I will actually be singing for a different requeim at the end of the month in addition to performing in orchestra again and now I'm trying to sort out my schedule to see if I can/should perform in a composition concert on April 4th. Concerts concerts concerts! It's insane!

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