July 2006

There must be something wrong with me !

July 14, 2006 20:04

Wow....just went on a family outing today. It was a HOT and sticky day here today but the local amusement park we visited had a nice water park. We don't often go anywhere exciting, but I spent the whole day quietly wishing I was home so I could try out some new tunes I had gotten the other day.

Man, that's just SICK !!!

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Now.......why did I want to do this whole violin thing ??

July 4, 2006 00:26

How incredibly frustrating !

I played in church yesturday....it was a last minute request by the pastor and I only had a few days to work on the tune...an easy enough tune but in a scale which isn't one of my favs (BbM) and the bowing was a bit tedious...but I figured.."heck, I can do this". I was going to be playing along with the keyboard but I didn't get to practice with her until just before the service. Just a few times through.

Man, what a blowout ! I did fine while we were practicing...it was just the two of us and I had showed up a half hour early to warm up and just enjoy playing by myself with no one else around. As soon as I got up there to play during the service.....I CHOKED ! GAAA ! I HATE that ! I didn't even get the doxology right..and I can play that one in my SLEEP ! OYE!

I started off ok but then for some reason I couldn't see the notes..(brain freeze!)..I tried to just play along by ear and memory of the tune but I couldn't do it ! LOL ! I suppose I didn't do as badly as I think I did and most folks probably didn't even notice my goofs...a missed note here or there, for the most part I at least played the notes in tune....LOL..even if they were the wrong ones AHAHAHA ! What an incredible let down and disappointment ! I was depressed for the rest of the day and didn't even want to LOOK at that stupid violin ! Went through the whole.."why am I even doing this" whine....pathetic !

I've only been playing for almost 4 years...and I seldom if ever get the opportunity to actually play for anyone....in public. One of the reasons I joined the fiddle group is to get used to playing in a group. We also sometimes play at a local restaurant,which helps me to get used to playing in public...but..........there are at least 15 of us and it's sooooo easy to hide and not be noticed. I don't get nervous at all when I play with those guys..most of them are just as bad as I am...LOL ! BUT....when it's just you and the piano however.........man !

Oh well, I don't think I want to do that again for another YEAR maybe....lol. Or at least until I can get the opportunity to work through a tune with the accompianist for more than 10 minutes. I did fine on the piece we worked on for a month before playing...I guess I'm just no good at improv...YET !

Anyway, I found a tutorial for music theory on the web....and it's like 3am right now and I'm sitting here typing this after going through the tutorial up to the "major scales" part. My head is swimming....I never was any good at math but I really really want to know just what all these notes and scales are about...and how they work. For you folks who grew up learning this stuff I must seem like a dunce........but I didn't know ANYTHING about music until I picked that violin up almost 4 years ago !

I so want to be able to do this....so I'll just pick up my bruised ego and try to sneak into church next week...maybe nobody will notice me in the back pew.....

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