Struggling alot with practicing

March 17, 2021, 10:44 PM · I've been struggling with practicing for a long time now. I've never been good at practice consistently through my nine years of playing, but I got by. Now, I'm preparing for college auditions. I've wanted to go into music for a long time now, but now at this point in my life, I'm not sure. It's become obvious to me that nothing I've been doing is good enough. I know what I need to do but for some reason, it's difficult for me. I'm frustrated because I want to be a professional violinist and I can barely practice once a day for more than an hour. The last time I practiced, which was earlier today, I felt so apathetic about the improvements I was trying to make,and felt that with it's pointless to try to practice if I can't do it consistently. I know that something is better than nothing, but that's not what it feels like. I know that if I went to school as a violin student, much more will be expected of me. If I can't I can't do it now, how can I expect to do it later? I feel so discouraged because if I want to be violinist, I need to figure something out.

But I'm not even sure I want to figure it out. But everyone in my life thinks I'm going to be a musician. My parents, my teacher, my twin sister, who is a cellist. Alot of people have supported me throughout my years as a violinist and I feel like I would let alot of people down if I didn't pursue that go. I know this decision isn't necessarily about them, but it still doesn't help feel better. I feel lame that I just can't commit to doing something that I should love. Even though I am a full time student and I work a part-time job, I still have plenty time to practice, but I just don't. I'm tired, I have work to do, the excuses I make for myself go on. I know this is super important if I want to pursue a career and I feel like I'm ruining my future.

I've tried doing it a little at time, thinking of the scholarships at stake, thinking of it as my job,(because it is) trying to establish a practice schedule. Nothing seems to work for me. I'm at a loss for what to do.

Replies

March 18, 2021 at 05:17 PM · Sounds like you need a break, and some inspiration. Try focusing on listening and exploring the world outside your practice room, maybe even take a formal break from violin. Are there any other interests you wish to pursue? Seriously consider other options in your life, so you don't feel like this path is the only one that you must take, but that if you go this path, it's something you are actually choosing. Maybe you need to take a nice juicy summer course in *fill in the blank - something that you love that makes no "sense" at all in regard to your college applications. You might find yourself motivated to practice again, or on a more true path for yourself. That's my non-conventional advise!

This article has been archived and is no longer accepting comments.

Facebook Twitter YouTube Instagram Email

Violinist.com is made possible by...

Shar Music
Shar Music

Yamaha Silent Violin
Yamaha Silent Violin

Juilliard Starling-DeLay Symposium on Violin Studies
Juilliard Starling-DeLay Symposium on Violin Studies

Pirastro Strings
Pirastro Strings

Corilon Violins
Corilon Violins

Find a Summer Music Program
Find a Summer Music Program

Dimitri Musafia, Master Maker of Violin and Viola Cases
Dimitri Musafia, Master Maker of Violin and Viola Cases

Violinist.com Business Directory
Violinist.com Business Directory

Violinist.com Guide to Online Learning
Violinist.com Guide to Online Learning

Dominant Pro Strings

Antonio Strad Violin

Bay Fine Strings Violin Shop

Bobelock Cases

Fiddlerman.com

Fiddlershop

Los Angeles Violin Shop

Nazareth Gevorkian Violins

Violin-Strings.com

Metzler Violin Shop

Leatherwood Bespoke Rosin

Warchal

Barenreiter

Johnson String Instrument and Carriage House Violins

Potter Violins

String Masters

Bein & Company

Annapolis Bows & Violins

Laurie's Books

Discover the best of Violinist.com in these collections of editor Laurie Niles' exclusive interviews.

Violinist.com Interviews Volume 1
Violinist.com Interviews Volume 1, with introduction by Hilary Hahn

Violinist.com Interviews Volume 2
Violinist.com Interviews Volume 2, with introduction by Rachel Barton Pine

Subscribe