April 20, 2010 at 2:24 AM
Wow, I've neglected this site (and blog) for far too long! I started to write a few times, but life is rather like a whirlwind.
I'm now almost done with my first year of college. Yikes! My last post was from the day after I moved into my dorm room in August. So much has changed since then. My perspective changes in little ways every day. It's really neat.
But, Catie, what about the music? The music is... me. I am the music. One of the most thought-provoking sayings from my prof this year- "be the music." I don't know if he'll ever know how much I end up thinking about little lines like that (or how I'll ever thank him for them). Why? I begin to transfer them and their meaning to "Catie the person" too. Usually, I don't like what I find when I do that, but I'm becoming a better person and musician as a result- which is what this is really all about!
However, I'm hitting a wall (motivationally) that I don't quite understand. I have no drive to make myself practice... but have no reason to feel unmotivated. Juries are looming in the near future, I have a concerto to finish up before mid-May (Wieniawski 2), and I love what I'm doing. So... what am I missing?
The only thing I can think of it that I'm mentally burned out. It's been a tough semester for me (incredibly hectic and not enough sleep) and maybe my brain has already given up. Well, I have a month left. Oops. So, for all of you college types and those who have been there before, how did you combat this issue?
Can't speak from a college type, but can speak from a "where do I get my motivation" type. Maybe you need to rediscover your muse in a different setting. Perhaps by performing for residents in a nursing or retirement home, for people who truly appreciate the bit of light you can bring them. You will never find a more receptive audience.
Well, it's presently 23h33 here and I'm currently doing an endless 20 pages college physic lab report in which I understand nothing at all... I plan to do this for a few hours still and will be in a rush like this for the next few months (final session of my science pre-universitary program) No need to say that, as a musician of heart and soul (my talent is much more musical and language oriented...), I am terribly unmotivated as well!!!!!!!!!!!
But I applied in healthcare things at university (momory skills mostly... I mean it's not nuclear physics or engeneiring... ) hopefully I'll find a link with this and music and love it! At least It will stick with my brain ability... Well, we'll see
At least, you do WHAT YOU LIKE THE MOST IN LIFE and this worths gold! Not many people have the luxury or talent to study in what they like above all!
My tricks to stay motivate in my life or in music?
- Try to realte everything I do that I hate with music! After all, so much notion of acoustic physics in my violin's sound... and also optic when I look in the mirror or with my eyes... Plus biology, ATP that allow my cells to be active and energy conservation that transfers from me to the instrument as cinetic energy + natural selection (oups but I should be eliminated form the violin...) But who care, I have freedom of spirit to chose for myself (phylosophy...) and all the mathematics equation that can explain the sound of the violin or of the best concert hall or why do I sound better in my bathroom... The stereo and amplification systems and coding of the info that allows me to listen to my favorite Oistrakh recordings without having to carry a gramophone and 30 kg of his vinils each time I go somewhere... The chemistry physiological reactions of the metabolism that should (I say should cause it don't always!) allow me to stay warm and a good circulation not to mention reactions that allows the combustion of gazoline to carry us violinists to our lessons (well not very positive this one...)
Anyway, one (more knowledgeable than me lol) could write a book about this...
Having long term goals: one day I'll be out of this, 7-10 years at university (cause I plan to do at least a masters... You know how it works nowadays... ) is just a portion of my life althoug a big! For an aspiring professional musician, it could be to think about how cool it will be when you'll have all those skills (as you see your knowledgeable teachers now...)
Allow yourself mental breaks (Like I'm doing now lol)
Listen to your favorite recordings!
Be honnest with yourself... Why are you unmotivated? Bad performance? It just doesn't feel "exciting"? Or is it fear of the something in the futur? Is it just a reaction to an overload of work?
This is hard but as long as someone lies to oneself, the problem will continue...
Study with friends. If you can, the burden is always less painful with someone else. Do you have study friends? You can ask yourselves questions "quiz" and make it fun!
Sorry for all this bla bla...
Thank you both for the wonderful suggestions, I appreciate them! :)
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