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Emily Grossman

End Times

March 23, 2006 at 10:59 AM

Equinox finally brought the temperatures above freezing the past two days, and no sooner had the ice in the streets begun to slush into potholes, the snowmen were out picketing against the onslaught of spring. A dozen of them stood on the side of the highway, their brightly colored signs fluttering protests to the passing traffic: “Say NO to SPRING!” “THE END IS NEAR!” “The PLOWS are HERE!”

Their sentiments, no doubt, are vastly in the minority, as protesters usually are. Likewise, all their efforts will not change the tide of meltage that is to come. I have forseen it; I saw fate stamped on their gaunt figures and drooping heads. It’s inevitable. It will be done. Let the breakup begin!

Meanwhile, the local Fred Meyer store put its bin of $1.99 stretch-gloves back in storage and brought out the flip flops and sunscreen. I think I'll buy a pair while they’re on sale. Who’s antsy for spring around here, anyway?



WARNING: GRAPHIC IMAGE


From Jamie Puffer
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 2:14 PM
Reminds me of Calvin and Hobbes! LOL!
From Patty Rutins
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 2:34 PM
I bet you put your students up to this! :)
From Sydney Menees
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 3:15 PM
Haha, someone has a lot of time on their hands! It's funny, though. I agree, Calvin and Hobbes!
From Mellisa Nill
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 5:09 PM
Hey Emily!

It was all I could do to stay on the road yesterday.

However, I do think that Mr. Webster has just a little too much time on his hands!

Mellisa

From Emily Grossman
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 5:30 PM
Ha, no, my students didn't do that. This particular corner on the highway has done something strange every winter. Last year, they stuck a hose over a bush and made a huge ice lump, dyed blue and red. The year before, they stuck a large sign on top of their house that said "UFO's WELCOME!"

These guys were a little more crude than the C&H snowmen.

From Terez Mertes
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 9:13 PM
HILARIOUS pics! Thanks for sharing.
From Linda Lerskier
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 9:13 PM
My life story.
From Jessica Smith
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 9:41 PM
I love it!!! Those pictures made me laugh.
From Emily Grossman
Posted on March 23, 2006 at 10:27 PM
UPDATE:

I returned to the location of the protesters, only to view their scattered remains on the berm. They were the victims, not of the sun, but of the blades of a hapless snow plow.

From Pauline Lerner
Posted on March 24, 2006 at 4:08 AM
...serves them right. I was guessing that the dirty work had been done by Evil Linda's apprentice.
From Linda Lerskier
Posted on March 24, 2006 at 8:14 PM
*cough* We have alibis. Don't we, Caeli?

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